Will I always feel a failure?

July 21, 2012

  I wonder when anyone ever feels they have arrived, and whether they ever do and how would they know? I don’t suppose anyone is going to reply to this saying ‘I have’ so it’ll have to be reflections from the ‘not made it’ side. If I think about it I have to concede that many […]

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Six of One and Half a Dozen of the Other?

July 16, 2012

  This is a popular little saw, and frequently applied to difficulties in relationships. It can be totally pernicious. Consider how many people you know in the world, or hear about, who are just plain awful. Bullying, violent, dishonest, addicted, inconsiderate, self centered, axe murderers (OK -I’ve been watching too much Scandinavian television..)

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Balance

July 7, 2012

There really isn’t any joy in someone feeling bad, even if they have been…. horrid.. I mean, it was really gratifying

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Nothing like a good cry?

June 29, 2012

Last night I watched people weeping on tv. It was a programme about how families lived in Edwardian times but seemed to be a programme about how to make people weep. Tears dripped at every opportunity. One man wept at discovering one of his ancestors had died of tuberculosis.

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Fairness

June 26, 2012

We all know that marriage is about loving and sharing. That must be about equal sharing, of course? Well, sure, if you win the lottery you’d split it, no problem. But what about the little things? Have you ever sneaked the best bit when you’re serving the food out of sight in the kitchen?

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Freedom.

June 11, 2012

We all do it. We all think we shouldn’t but we would be very odd if we didn’t and we do do it: categorise people on sight. Age, race, gender – willy nilly (wonderful expression) we label. And then comes along the internet and social media – and we can suddenly potentially all talk to each other […]

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Family or friends?

May 1, 2012

This is another special request post! (Sounds good but I really only have two and a half readers really and one of them is married to me). It’s for a post about birthdays – I had one recently. Particularly about celebrating them, or perhaps not, since they are just about adding another year, which must […]

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Learning to be lazy.

April 29, 2012

Up to about the age of five or six we are well programmed to learn rules. Therapists call them introjects because we swallow them whole. We learn simple instructions and rules which then become automatic – or we don’t. In which case we become delinquent, and after six it’s probably too late to do anything […]

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If you prick me, do I not bleed?

April 18, 2012

I recently had an article in the Spectator. The day after the link appeared on twitter I had a tweet from someone offering me a link to their blog. I knew better than to follow it, seeing the source, so ignored it. It was followed by a second, saying I would like this blog post. […]

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To have children? Or not bother?

April 12, 2012

This is a special request blog post. How about that?? I’ve been asked to consider the issue of having – or perhaps not having – children. We chose not to. And perhaps the starkest thing about this is that I have never once, for one moment, regretted not having children. I wonder how many parents […]

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